15 Strange New Uses For Vodka

At least three of these useful remedies are for problems caused by vodka in the first place. Vodka is the kind of friend that’ll punch you in the face, then help you find your recently-lost front tooth in that dimly lit alley next to Maloney’s.  Dick. Or what about the time he broke into your house to have his way with some floozy he met at the bar, in your bed no less?! … but he was so kind to clean your sheets the next morning and buy you a breakfast burrito. Screw vodka.

1. To remove a bandage painlessly, saturate the bandage with vodka. The
   solvent dissolves adhesive.
2. To clean the caulking around bathtubs and showers, fill a trigger-spray
   bottle with vodka, spray the caulking, let set five minutes and wash clean.
   The alcohol in the vodka kills mold and mildew.
3. To clean your eyeglasses, simply wipe the lenses with a soft, clean
   cloth dampened with vodka. The alcohol in the vodka cleans the glass and
   kills germs.
4. Prolong the life of razors by filling a cup with vodka and letting your
   safety razor blade soak in the alcohol after shaving.  The vodka disinfects
   the blade and prevents rusting.
5. Spray vodka on vomit stains, scrub with a brush, and then blot dry.
6. Using a cotton ball, apply vodka to your face as an astringent to
   cleanse the skin and tighten pores.
7. Add a jigger of vodka to a 12-ounce bottle of shampoo. The alcohol
   cleanses the scalp, removes toxins from hair, and stimulates the growth of
   healthy hair.
8. Fill a sixteen-ounce trigger-spray bottle and spray bees or wasps to
   kill them.
9. Pour one-half cup vodka and one-half cup water in a Ziploc freezer bag
   and freeze for a slushy, refreshable ice pack for aches, pain or black
   eyes.
10. Fill a clean, used mayonnaise jar with freshly packed lavender flowers,
    fill the jar with vodka, seal the lid tightly and set in the sun for three
    days.  Strain liquid through a coffee filter, then apply the tincture to
    aches and pains.
11. To relieve a fever, use a washcloth to rub vodka on your chest and back
    as a liniment.
12. To cure foot odor, wash your feet with vodka.
13. Vodka will disinfect and alleviate a jellyfish sting.
14. Pour vodka over an area affected with poison ivy to remove the urushiol
    oil from your skin.
15. Swish a shot of vodka over an aching tooth. Allow your gums to absorb
    some of the alcohol to numb the pain.

Russians probably have a lot more uses. For example this video shows how Russian ninjas use vodka to increase their strength and reaction time.

Tags: vodka

This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 29th, 2008 at 10:42 am and is filed under drinking. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.