Three Deer Go For a Beer Run

Deers for Beers – Well, not sure what the hell these deer were up to charging in this liquor store. Imaging working in a lazy, local beer shop just minding your time when a frantic herd of deer go ballistic all over your ass. Check out the video it’s pretty wild:

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RIP Ol’ Dirty Bastard

As Robotindisguise put it:

RIP Ol’ Dirty Bastard a.k.a ODB a.k.a Big Baby Jesus, Sweet Baby Jesus a.k.a Dirt McGirt a.k.a Dirt Dog a.k.a Russell Jones a.k.a Osirus (Osirus the father) a.k.a Joe Bananas. a.k.a Ol’ Dirt Schultz. a.k.a Hasaan. a.k.a Ill Irving the Murderer a.k.a The BZA a.k.a The Drunken Master Styles a.k.a Ason Jones, Ason Unique a.k.aRain Man.

Died too young 5 years ago taday.

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Behold: The McNuggetini

Apparently the McNuggetini drink recipe has been all over the internets, creating quite a stir. I mean who doesn’t want a martini with the following ingredients:

  • McDonald’s milk shake
  • Vodka
  • Chicken McNuggets
  • BBQ Sauce

According to the sexy redhead in the video, “It’s like a white Russian on angel dust.” So if you’re hankering for some classy cocktails for your Friday night, just head to your nearest Mickey D’s!

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Beer-fueled and beer-inspired tattoos

Branding one’s own flesh with a permanent symbol used to be a meaningful statement, displaying to the world a symbol that defined or represented something important about you. Now that thirty-six percent of those ages 18 to 25, and 40 percent of those ages 26 to 40, have at least one tattoo (source), it seems to be more of a fad than anything. And with the frightening number of tribal arm bands and tramp stamps, clearly this fad has jumped the shark.

I’m not exactly sure what it says when you decide to go for a beer-related tattoo, but seeing as beer plays a central part of the 40cozy lifestyle, it seems like a valid subject matter for some ink. Some of these tats are amazing, others hilarious, and some may fall into the Hall of Tattoo Shame. Check out these awesome beer tattoos, and you can be the judge:

If you have a beer tattoo that you want listed, post a link in the comments below!

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9th Century Chinese = Regretful Party Animals

Getting shit-canned and making an ass of yourself at dinner parties is a long-standing practice of the fine gentlemen of 40cozy. We’ve all been there – hitting on someone’s mom, eating off others’ plates, slurring your words through horribly off-color dead baby jokes… feel free to share your awesomely horrible/horribly awesome stories in the comments.

Well apparently this was quite the common practice in 9th centure China, as LettersofNote explains:
As far back as the 9th Century, the beautifully named ‘Dunhuang Bureau of Etiquette’ insisted that local officials use the following letter template (dated 856) when sending apologies to offended dinner hosts. The guilty party would copy the template text, enter the dinner host’s name, sign the letter and then deliver with head bowed.

Here’s the document, which was found in a sealed cave in China:

Translated, this letter reads:

Yesterday, having drunk too much, I was intoxicated as to pass all bounds; but none of the rude and coarse language I used was uttered in a conscious state. The next morning, after hearing others speak on the subject, I realised what had happened, whereupon I was overwhelmed with confusion and ready to sink into the earth with shame.

The modern version of this is something like a template apology email or something you’d find at textsfromlastnight.com. I love that it was so customary for local officials to get wasted at dinner gatherings, someone decided to create a stock “I’m sorry I threw up on your cat” letter and distributed copies.

To read more about the project that revealed this letter and thousands more 9th century Chinese documents visit http://idp.bl.uk/

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Stop: Hammered Time!

This guy might be the drunkest I’ve ever seen a person who can still walk. Well, “still walk” is way too kind. He’s stammering, fall down drunk, wasted as all hell crawling on the ground drunk. I mean, it’s 10:47AM on a Tuesday, can’t a guy just buy a sixer? This video was caught on a liquor store’s security camera last week. Too funny. Check it out.

Drunkest Guy Ever Goes for More Beer – Watch more Funny Videos

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Your Daily Serving of Links

Bored? Well here’s some links for you to check out. All of these links are fall under at least one of these categories: funny, WTF, interesting, sexy. Now click on these links and enjoy.

Seven Funniest Office Prank Videos

http://twoyoutubevideosandamotherfuckingcrossfader.com/ – The url pretty much explains it all. You can start two videos at the same time and fade in between the music to create your own mashup remix. So get on that mahfukkincrossfader!

Dog vs Man, Dance Battle – Don’t mess with furries. (video)

http://peopleinpizzaslicecostumesbecomingpizzas.com – uh, yeah…

Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeit (video)

Best reaction ever (pic)

Drag racing school bus! (video)

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Come to the 40cozy Art Show!

40-ounce-art-show

If you’re a fellow San Diegan or you’re in town August 15′th come join us at our Inaugural 40cozy art show.  This will be a joint show of various artists using the 40cozy as a medium along with the works of one of our favorite local artists, Nowaymonkey.  Come say hi and have a little fun with us.  It will be at Voz Alta Project, 1754 National Ave. San Diego, CA 92037.

Here is a piece to whet your appetite.

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Ghetto Baskets

I was just emailed a link to GhettoBaskets.com, a site that sells gift baskets filled with the cheapest ghetto staples and ‘what falls off of trucks around the neighborhood.’

ghetto-baskets

A basket might include some of the following ghetto goods: purple drink, beef jerky, pork rinds, religious candle, pregnancy test, doo rag, plastic commemorative plate.

We at 40cozy thought this idea up a while back, but I’m happy to see someone else is actually doing it. And they’re doing it well. The site is bad ass and the baskets are perfect. With one exception. We think they should have a 40cozy in there, because a Ghetto Basket can’t really be complete without some malt liquor.

When is a good occasion to send a Ghetto Basket you ask? According to their site:

You just found out the baby isn’t yours
A loved one was recently released from prison
The tornado didn’t blow your trailer away
Mom found her tooth
You just got your GED
Arbor Day

Go check out their site, and send one of these to your hoodrat/thug friends.

(Note to Ghetto Baskets homies – you should think about adding some of the following: Mexican candy, Hot Cheetos, fake tattoos, bandana, tall socks, menthol cigarettes (or flavored cigarillos), rolling papers, Lil Homies figurines, wife beater, Planned Parenthood condoms. You could have a guy basket and girl basket also, the ladies’ basket having lip liner, etc. Just some ideas. Those are all staple items in our local liquor stores.)

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Russian Drunken Yoga

I think by comparing the images of drunks to yoga poses they want to emphasize the comparable health benefits of passing out in public to the ancient discipline of yoga. At least that’s what I get from these images. Quite hilarious how people could get so drunk as to pass out in such positions.

I mean I’ve tried my damnedest to get this drunk, but the craziest situation I’ve ever woke up in is on a stranger’s couch, sitting upright, in nothing but my underwear, body sticky and smelling of whiskey, my hand covered in blood, and the fire alarm going off right out front of the apartment at 150 decibels, with a newly acquired mullet. Hmm, in retrospect that is pretty bizarre. Well, check out these drunken Russians performing some advanced yoga poses. Impressive!

russian_drunk_yogarussian_drinkers_yogadrunk_yoga Read the rest of this entry »

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